Balancing motherhood and a career has been a wild ride. It's full of love and joy, but man, it can also get really lonely. As a working mom, I hardly find time to socialize, and I've felt my friendships slipping away over the past four years. Invitations have dried up, and making new friends seems harder than ever.
My days are hectic. From morning drop-offs to midnight wakeups, there's barely any "me" time, let alone time to hang out with friends. Between work, trying to be a good mom and wife, and handling everything at home, I often feel like I'm stretched way too thin. Loneliness sneaks in during the oddest moments – during my commute, between tasks at work, or when I’m trying to unwind at home. It's weird feeling so isolated when you're constantly around people.
My daily routine is all about efficiency. I wake up at 5 a.m. to squeeze in a workout, get ready while everyone else is still asleep, make sure my son is fed and ready for his day, and then I dive into work. My workday is a constant juggle between job tasks and quick check-ins at home. By the time I'm back with my family, it's dinner, bedtime routines, and then I usually crash around 8:30 p.m. The cycle repeats and finding time for meaningful social interactions seems nearly impossible.
One of the hardest things has been the decline in social invitations. Friends seem to assume I'm too busy or too tired to join in. Coffee dates, happy hours, or weekend outings have almost stopped. It sucks feeling left out and even more isolated. I miss the spontaneous hangouts and easy social life from before I had a baby. Realizing I'm being left out is a tough pill to swallow.
At first, I tried hard to keep up with my social life. I made plans with friends to maintain relationships, but I noticed I was often the one reaching out. I wanted to prove I could still be the same person despite my new responsibilities. But as time went on, exhaustion set in. I started declining invitations more and more, and soon enough, the invites themselves became fewer. Friends would mention events I hadn't been invited to, and it stung. It felt like a slow, painful distancing that I couldn't control.
Maintaining friendships as a working mom requires effort and time, both of which are in short supply. Most of my friends' lives continue their usual paths, filled with career pursuits, social events, and personal hobbies, while mine is split between work and parenting. This difference creates a gap that's hard to bridge. Conversations that once flowed easily now feel strained as we struggle to find common ground. The distance grows, and friendships that were once my support system feel fragile.
I've found that the topics of conversation have shifted dramatically. While my friends talk about their latest adventures, career milestones, or new hobbies, my mind is often preoccupied with thoughts of my child, school events, or simply managing to get through the week. This difference in focus can make our interactions feel awkward and forced. The shared experiences that once bonded us seem to be fading.
The emotional support I used to receive from friends has changed too. They’re still caring and understanding, but the depth of our connection feels different. The spontaneous heart-to-hearts that once defined our friendships are replaced with rushed updates and random check-ins. It’s not that my friends don’t care, but our lives have gone in different directions, making it hard to maintain the same level of closeness.
One of the unexpected joys of this journey has been forming stronger relationships. Through my career, I have created new support systems and gained solid friendships. I’ve also had the opportunity to find deeper connections with close friends who are navigating motherhood alongside me. These connections have been a lifeline. Whether it's sharing parenting tips, venting about sleepless nights, or simply understanding each other’s hectic schedules, the connection I have felt with these people has been invaluable. These new friendships, built on shared experiences and mutual support, have made the journey of motherhood a bit less lonely.
Being a working mom is a balancing act, and the loneliness that comes with it is a real challenge. Many other working moms are navigating the same path. Building a supportive community takes time, but it’s worth the effort to make this journey a little less lonely.
The key is to remain open, patient, and proactive in nurturing both old and new relationships. It’s about finding a balance that works for you and understanding that it’s okay for friendships to evolve. As I continue this journey, I’m learning that the love and connections we build, no matter how small, can make all the difference. The bonds I’ve formed through this new chapter have become a cherished part of my life, providing support, laughter, and understanding in ways I never expected.
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